As I wrote in my previous post, God has blessed me beyond words during my short time in Wake Forest. The ways that He has provided for me are wonderful and have far exceeded any of my expectations. However, it just doesn’t feel like home yet. Right now, Williamsburg still feels like my home, and it just feels so weird to know that I’m not going back. It is like being really thirsty, but knowing you’ll never get a drink of water. I’m sure with time, Wake Forest will become my new home. I do wonder, however, if a place will ever hold my heart the way Williamsburg or William and Mary does. I wonder if there will be a time when I refer to “my school” and mean Southeastern instead of W&M.
It is odd to feel so divided. Part of me is trying to plant roots here, and the other part of me still feels so connected to my old home. So far, the biggest difference between the high school >> college transition and the college >> grad school transition, is that William and Mary was instantly home for me. The place and the people there captured my heart from the very first night. Even now, I think about my first night on campus singing the Alma Mater in front of the President’s house and I almost tear up. I guess I was expecting Southeastern to be the same way. Again, I want to say that I know I’m in the right place at the right time, but it is such a different realm for me. Until last fall, I was never really thought that I would end up in vocational ministry one day.
These feelings have made me ponder whether or not I should ever be so attached to a place. I know that the only being that our heart should ever be truly attached to is Jesus. I also know that sometimes God can give us a passion for a place or a people with the end to bring glory to Himself through that. I guess I just have to pray that what is of God will stay in my life and everything else will be thrown away.
On a completely different note, here is one of the many really good thought’s from Dr. Akin’s opening address today. Instead of praying (in regard to missions) “Lord, should I go?”, pray “Lord, why should I stay?” I am hoping that SEBTS will post the video of his address online. It was full of such good wisdom for all believers. I will be sure to share it with you if they post it.
Thank you, anonymous readers, for being my sounding wall.