I started this post a while ago, with intentions of publishing it around graduation. Better late than never?
As I transition from college to seminary, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and reflecting on my college experience. I thought of this song (video below) from Mulan and have been pondering the question, “Does my reflection show who I am inside?”. During college, experienced many of the feelings that Mulan expresses in this song. For much of my independent thinking life, I have experienced tension between what I want (or what I think I want) and home. (While home does include my family, it includes a lot more than that.)
The prime example of this tension in my life during college is turning down the job at home and deciding to go to seminary. One of the hard parts of this kind of tension is that it doesn’t result from a lack of care or concern for your wellbeing. Quite the opposite, it is a result of tremendous care and concern about you and your future. It is very hard to go a different direction than the one your family or home sees as best for you. I would say that it is simultaneously freeing and heartbreaking, however the it just overwhelmingly feels like the right thing to do, the right way to be.
p.s. Please pardon my poor grammar and writing skills, I am working on them.